Monthly Archives: February, 2004


1.) Happy Leap Day! We have a whole extra day this year, but did I spend it laying around, getting an extra day’s worth of rest? I wish.

2.) I have been busier than… something really busy… lately, which is why I haven’t blogged all week. I am, however, alive and productive.

3.) I was home sick on Wednesday, after being achy and very tired Tuesday night. I was so weak, I could barely lift the covers to climb into bed (at, like, 11!) without grimacing from the pain. Illness chose a convenient day to strike, though, since there was testing and frozen schedule. Nothing important to miss.

4.) I went to school on Thursday, even though we had testing again, because I am a dork. I spent the day being bored, doing busywork for PreCal, reading, and playing Monopoly after school in lieu of regular It’s Academic practice. We need Mr. T back.

5.) I got my hair done Friday night. Hope, I do feel lightheaded. And I have a lot of hair, so that’s saying something. It’s basically frizz-free now. Really flat and shiny. So not me. Oh well, the halo of frizz shall return eventually.

6.) I was invited to interview for merit scholarships at UMD in March. I have yet to RSVP (I’ll miss an Adkins lecture), but I will this week.

7.) I saw Eurotrip with Greg last night, after spending the day running errands and being confused with the copy machine at the library. It was American Pie in Europe. As Iyen put it, “lots of T&A.” If you don’t know what that means, you probably don’t need to. There were some genuinely funny moments, like the main character’s robot fight in France (you have to see it), and the running gag of the song. That same guy’s girlfriend (Kristin Kreuk) cheats on him, and the guy she’s cheating with (Matt Damon) sings a song about it, “Scotty Doesn’t Know.” It’s a terrible song, but it’s catchy beyond reason. I protested about going to see it, and Greg made me cover my eyes (and smudged my glasses), and I didn’t like it, but it was… eh. If you have nothing better to do, you can find something better to see than that movie.

8.) Spent today doing homework, reading, and falling asleep. Am currently working on RP chapter. Being long-winded is such a talent now.


I miss the times when I could blog every single day. Sure, sometimes I’d just ramble for half a dozen paragraphs, but the rambling might lead to something worth reading. At least, that’s how I feel about it. So, I’m going to stop playing catch-up all the time. If it comes to me while I’m writing, I’ll write it. Otherwise, it was probably mundane anyway. Thanks for missing me, though. If I don’t show up for a few days, just send some positive vibes in my direction. I’m probably working hard, stressed out and/or depressed, so I could use them.

And for the record, I fully intended to post this last night, but Mom offered IHOP and then I talked to Greg, so yeah. But no worries, I’m still alive and kicking. Struggling occasionally, but breathing.

Saturday was almost relaxing. I watched a lot of tv, did discussion points, and talked to Greg. I intended to get online, but I read a little more of The Three Musketeers instead. I swear, Ian and Greg picked the second-longest book ever written. Our analysis papers were originally due this week, but Ms. Sim has quietly given us an extension because pretty much everyone’s still reading. In addition to the paper, we have to give a group oral presentation, which is why I’m with those two. If they were still due this week, she’d have reminded us and assigned presentation dates. Since she hasn’t, I’ll just keep reading and trying to find a theme.

On Friday, I took the bus to school again. We got there at 9:30, so I was only a few minutes late to class. I naturally walk fast, and I weave through the masses so I can keep moving. Anyway, school was fine. Nothing standout. We milled around during the latter half of AP Lit, which is always nice. Ms. Sim hasn’t taken the Adkins approach to double periods. He just moves through the same material faster, which is why we’re studying now what last year’s class studied shortly before the AP exam in May. Ms. Sim seems to be teaching at the same pace, which often leaves her short of material and long on time.

Notable events from this past week: I was up late on Wednesday night doing another outline for Adkins. I really don’t mean to procrastinate. I just have so much to do on a daily basis, so I push back the long-term assignments until I can’t push them any more. Then, I get a chance to breathe, so I do, when I could more efficiently work ahead. I’m a senior. Everyone else wants it to be May so they can just stay home. I want it to be May so I can stop working so damn hard, at least for a little while.

Also last week, we had a math quiz. There were only two questions, which can be this kiss of death if you don’t really know what you’re doing. I did some “creative math” on the second problem, which is why I got it wrong. It was mostly correct, though, so I squeezed a 90 out of it. I think Ms. O’Neal was feeling generous since so many people missed that one. For some reason, the parabolas are throwing me. I think I understand, though. I hope so. I can afford a not-so-good grade everyone once in a while, but that doesn’t mean I’m happy with it.

Today, we had a math test. I took the bus to school, so I was almost late for it, but I think I did okay. Especially considering my day started late. See, I was in a rush to get to bed last night (I’m thinking of giving myself a phone curfew), so when I set my alarm, I didn’t push the slider far enough. It was set to “music”, which is bad because I keep the volume turned off on that clock/radio. I miraculously woke up at 7:30, which is bad because I get out of bed no later than 6:45 on school days. I managed to get ready in time to catch the bus, though not without being rushed and disgruntled along the way. Point is, I made it.

We had an English test today, too. It was actually a quiz that counted as a test grade. Anyway, Jarred mentioned something about me getting the same grade as him on the quiz/test, and it wasn’t good. I really hope he’s wrong. Sure, The Stranger is existentialism and therefore not easy to understand, but there’s almost no detail. Ms. Sim’s quizzes consist of the few details she can squeeze out (What day of the week does Chapter 6 happen on?) and text quotes. Lots of text quotes, but the writing’s pretty predictable. I can’t afford a bas test grade, since we never have many tests as is. I hope he was wrong.

Speaking of Jarred, he loaned me his Barron’s book for the AP US History test. As of now (pending parental approval, i.e. cash), I’m going to take it. I might drain myself completely studying for two AP tests on consecutive days, but I’ll try. Elections throw me, too. I try to have confidence, but… yeah. I did finally get a perfect score on my outline, though. It took forever to write and was way more detailed than my outlines usually are, but I got full points and that’s what matters.

What else? I was offered a President’s Fellow Scholarship to UMBC, which is work $5000 per year for four years. Tuition is about $7000 in-state, so that’s a nice chunk out.

Also, I just (as in, my dad brought the mail in five minutes ago; ours runs really late) got my acceptance letter to the University of Maryland, and an invitation to the University Honors Program! I got the email that everyone else did on Friday, but I didn’t check my email that day, so I didn’t know until yesterday. And the email didn’t mention Honors. I didn’t expect a letter so soon, though. This is fabulous. No money yet (if any will be offered), but I didn’t get my other offers until after the acceptance, so I’m still hopeful. This makes my whole day!

Oh, and since it seems that I forgot to post about it, Valentine’s Day was lovely. The Olive Garden had excellent food, though there was more of it than I could eat. If there’s more food on my plate than I have room for, I’m not going to “clean” it.


I’ll open with the strangest news headline I’ve seen in a long time (including Bush’s nomination for the freakin’ Nobel Peace Prize): Barbie and Ken are splitting up after 43 years. My reaction: “Huh?” I mean, the whole joke about them not being married after all those mansions and wedding dresses is one of my favorite Barbie gags, but really. Like the article said: Do the people at Mattel not have enough work to do? They invent real social lives for their dolls? Some people have too much time on their hands.

It’s been a long week. I can barely remember the details of the earlier days. In fact, I can’t remember at all.

Wednesday, I hung around for It’s Ac, but Mr. T was out. It turns out that he had major surgery and is still in the hospital recovering. He felt sick on Sunday, and he’s been in the hospital ever since. He should be back around the week after next. I feel bad. Mr. T’s a cool guy. We’re working out arrangements for a card to send to him in the hopsital next week; Mrs. Anderson said she’d drop it off on her way home for us.

Yesterday was Greg and my first anniversary. We actually survived an entire year. Considering who we are, and the stuff we’ve dealt with, it’s a miracle. We’ve come close to breaking up twice (maybe three times), but we just care about each other too much to give up now. We have this safe sort of codependency. I honestly don’t think I’d have made it this far through the Year from Hell without him there to support me. I know, I rarely get gushy like this here, but I love him and I want to share that with you and him. He brought me a rose and a tiger Beanie Baby (which I actually already had, but it was still sweet). I felt special being the only one with a flower, though most people just thought he’d started early.

I spent hours last night working on my science fair board, watching ER at the same time. It’s not great, but then again, neither is my project. I just did the best I could, keeping my perfectionism in mind, and wound up with a pretty good-looking project.

My parents left today for Atlantic City. Smokey Robinson is giving a concert there tomorrow. Smokey is to my mom what *NSync is to me, only she didn’t get to see Smokey while she was still a teenager. I thought her plans might interfere with my plans at first, but Greg and I can still go out tomorrow, so I’m good.

So now I’m stuck with the rugrats for the weekend. I took Courtney to basketball practice tonight. We were running a bit behind, but everything was okay. I even managed to get some reading done for my AP Lit paper. Greg, Ian, and I are reading The Three Musketeers, since we have to do a group presentation as well. It’s a good book, not at all slow or boring. It’s just so long. Of course, as soon as we got home, they started fighting again. I swear, they wait until I’m in charge before they push each other into walls and slam doors and scream about how they hate each other.

I also had an Adkins test today. I didn’t get a chance to study at all last night, but I was ready early this morning, so I read my notes before I left for school. I squeezed in the rest of the discussion points during RP, Geology, and lunch. I actually feel positive about this test. Usually I’m just indifferent. I’m afraid to get my hopes up, then come crashing back to reality. My essay may have been totally off-base. I sort of used the technique of writing everything I knew about the topic. Some of it has to be correct.

On Monday, I think, I walked into AP US History and Connie, who sits next to me, told me we had a quiz. All the quizzes in that class are pop quizzes, so I just asked what discussion points and reached for my notes to read over them. She was kidding. I didn’t react like most people do (“What? We have a quiz? Oh man, the one night I didn’t read!”), so she said, “Lindsay, it just seems like nothing fazes you.” I replied, “Well, things just keep fazing so often that they really don’t anymore.” I have so much to deal with that none of it affects me strongly anymore. I used to dwell upon everything, and it tore me apart. Just thinking about all that crap made me cry. I couldn’t deal with that, so I moved toward this, where my emotions are muted. On some level, that can be a good thing; it’s easier to get things accomplished when you’re not fighting depressed sighs. On another level, it means all the stress is really getting to me.

Friday Five: Supernatural.

1. Are you superstitious? Not really. A black cat ran in front of my car tonight, which is extremely coincidental considering the date, but we’re all fine, as is my car.

2. What extremes have you heard of someone going to in the name of superstition? I don’t know anyone superstitious enough to live their live avoiding bad luck.

3. Believer or not, what’s your favorite superstition? I always liked “step on a crack, break your mother’s back” when I was little. I realized that, if that were true, everyone’s mom would be in the hospital all the time.

4. Do you believe in luck? If yes, do you have a lucky number/article of clothing/ritual? I believe in fate, insofar as forces beyond our control that determine what will happen. No object has ever been lucky for me, though.

5. Do you believe in astrology? Why or why not? Ah, this is my question. Yes, but only profiles. Astrological predictions have to be too general to be correct, but profiles are usually eerily on point.


I spent a large part of last night tweaking and redesigning pages that, for the most part, no one ever sees. Yep, I know how to waste time when I have some to spare.

I went shopping in Waldorf today. All by myself, for the first time. I got everything I set out to get, but only because I made a list. The things I accidentally left off the list (a new watch, a new shower sponge) are the ones I forgot. My oil light was freaking out on the way there, but my dad just refilled it, and it only beeped on the way there, so either my car has poltergeist (!), or it’s just acting oddly. That’s not surprising. I love it, but it has issues. I’ve been meaning to name my car, so I can stop calling it “the car.” That reminds me of a quote from the Good Ship, back in my FictionAlley board days.

I’ll be washing Ron this weekend. Rubbing sudsy water and hot wax all over him, any one care to help me? (Move over!) He’s a smooth ride too, but I always use protection.You know, seatbelts!

For anyone who didn’t catch it, that poster’s car is named Ron. Come now, shippers are crazy, but not that crazy.

I am proud of myself for (a) not hitting or nearly-hitting anything, (b) successfully parking three or four times, (c) finding my way to Target and Staples with little difficulty, and (d) not getting pulled over by that state trooper on the way home. I was only going about four miles over the speed limit, though. I think it’s fifteen before they give you points on your license. (Since when is getting points a bad thing? Well, besides in golf?)

I also realized that I need to quit buying things for myself. I’ll look for a new watch in Wal-Mart or the BX; I’ll be out looking for birthday presents for my dad and Courtney anyway. In my house in winter, it’s everybody’s birthday. Then none until mine at the end of August.

I saw a Hummer on the way home. I think that’s the first time I’ve seen one in real life. I was glancing in my right mirror (yay for being a safer driver! I thank Stephanie for inspiring that in me), and I saw this huge black car coming up fast. It got in front of me, completely blocking the stoplight. It was like I was behind a half-size black bus. I didn’t even like driving the van. How do people handle those things?

My dad offered me a computer yesterday! I mean, it’s for school next year, but still. This one annoys me so much. Is a functioning CD drive so much to ask for?

Greg sent me a very cute Shrek 2 e-card. Thanks, babe. We’re going to the Olive Garden for Valentine’s Day and a belated anniversary celebration. It’s the twelfth, our anniversary. On one hand, it’s hard to believe we’ve been together this long (although technically, we didn’t “go out” for the first two months). On the other hand, it’s perfectly reasonable. We’ve been through hell and back, almost literally. The scars will always be there, but there’s lots of love and laughter to cover them up. I owe so much to him. Thank you, Greg, for being there for me all this time and for being such a wonderful boyfriend.

You know, that last bit seems like it should be posted on Thursday. I doubt I’ll remember to copy and paste it in then, though, so I’ll just leave it there now.

Monday mornings are bad, but Sunday evenings are almost worse. I have to go to bed early, even though I’m not tired since I slept in this morning (to a degree). There’s a whole week of school ahead, and the inevitable stress that comes with balancing all the aspects of my life. And I have to nag my parents about the FAFSA. I know I told them in the fall that they’d have to have their taxes done really early for that form. And neither of them seems to have received their PIN emails….

But that is a rant for another day.


Ah. The letter from UMBC just arrived. I’m in. After visiting a few weeks ago, I got the overwhelming impression that it’s a science school. It’s also a commuter school, so about half the student body goes home on weekends. I’m not keen on science, so I get the feeling that UMBC isn’t the place for me. I have to keep it on the list, though, especially when I found out whether I got into the honors program. I got a letter from them right after I mailed the application in December, but it said they couldn’t make a decision until the university did.

Greg went out with his family yesterday, so we wound up being late for our double date with Ian and Erin (a freshman, from another school). Erin was really quiet, but she may have just been shy. I used to be really shy like that, but it’s such a waste of time. It’s much more efficient to just ask someone what their name is, or jump into a random conversation. How else do you get to know people?

I hate being late for anything, even by just a few minutes, always-start-late NHS meetings included. We went to Uno’s first. They have good pizza, it just has tomatoes. I don’t like tomatoes. They’re like fruits (wait, they are fruits): I don’t like the actual object, but its products are fine. Tomato sauce. Applesauce. I love orange juice.

Anyway. The atmosphere was just like school, only not. I half expected them to play Magic; turns out Ian had his deck on him. It’s those purse/cargo pockets. We were late for the movie, The Butterfly Effect, but we didn’t miss much and came across four seats right away. I’ve never missed previews before — ever — but I’m fine. I can catch the ads elsewhere. The movie was interesting, to say the least. We all jumped several times. I’d read in CosmoGirl that it was more funny than psycho-thriller, but it was thriller-y (thrilling?) enough for me. It was also really confusing, but it came together after a while. The kid who played Ashton Kutcher’s character at age seven had a lot of cursing in his dialogue. It makes me wonder, what do stage parents think when their kids do that? It bothers me, and I don’t even know these people.

I had to get up early this morning to take Ryan to his basketball game at the youth center on base. My parents went to a funeral for my mom’s uncle. I never met him. The game was, dare I say, fun. Even when the man sitting next to me asked what number my son was. I always get mistaken for someone’s mom when I’m at the youth center. Do I just look way older than I am, or do they think I’m just a really young mom? Ryan missed his free throws, but he stole (do you steal in basketball?) the ball a few times. He’s a good player. I did gymnastics, tap, and ballet when I was little, and I pretty much sucked at all of them. The rugrats have academic talent, but they got some athletics, too. It’s not fair. I want a sport, too. I am living proof that you can get into college without having played a sport, but still. It worried me.

It’s been another lazy day. It seems longer, though, since I started so much earlier than a usual non-school day. I wanted to go shop in Waldorf this afternoon, but I forgot my parents were going out. So, if I go (which I plan to), I have to take them with me. Boo. I want to shop alone, but I can’t risk waiting until tomorrow and not getting to go at all. I have things to buy, but I need a science fair board for Thursday. Unless it’s more than $10. Then I’ll check with Ms. Comerford on Monday.

For now, I think I have stuff to do. Failing that, I got a new CosmoGirl! in the mail.


To eliminate confusion, that latest guestbook entry is from Hope. I’ve been busy, so I have to play catch-up again.

On Wednesday, I got up early for NHS. Mornings suck. They should happen later in the day. I might not hate them so much then. The meeting was the same as the others: it started late, half the members were missing (including some officers), and we didn’t discuss anything meaningful. NHS sponsors a blood drive every year, so we have to do it, too. I don’t think they get much participation, though. You have to be at least 17, which takes out over half of the school. Most of all, you can’t be freaked out by needles. Fear aside, I don’t know if I’d be able to donate blood if I wanted to. I had my blood tested for anemia last summer, but I never found out the results.

Mr. Price seems more excited about my scholarship than I am. (Thanks for all your congratulations about that, by the way.) He’s from Pennsylvania, which I never knew. He said, “It’s good to see some of that scholarship money floating around coming here.” He’s trying to coordinate a trip up there with my family and Dana’s, but I don’t know if it’ll fly. My ideal plan would be to hit Pitt and Penn State in one day, or at least the same weekend.

We had a math quiz, which I sort of studied for. I got 100 on it, so something must have stuck. Lots of formulas this time, which makes math so much easier. I was really tired, so I was drowsy during AP US History. We discussed sonnets in AP Lit, so I spaced out for most of it. I dozed off a few times. I’ll give her one more “discussion” period like that before I spend the time reading, like Ian and Greg. Some of our other classmates were irritated because Ms. Sim told Jamesa to stop reading her prom magazine, but she lets Ian read all the time. I understand her completely. He gets A’s, he’s quiet, and when she calls on him, he has something productive to say. Jamesa doesn’t fall into that category, especially the quiet part. People just like to jump on any sort of injustice they think they see.

After school, It’s Ac was fine. I played what we call “the gauntlet” — a team with just me against a team of everyone else. I held up quite well, but I’ve been playing longer than they have. I’m not so afraid to push the button, I know when to interrupt the question, and I know a lot of trivia. Greg read, but he was biased against me. He stopped after a while, though. A few times during the game, they came close to beating me, but not quite.

I came home and fought with my math homework over Smallville and Angel before I gave up. The shows didn’t distract me; it was just tricky. Good episodes, though. It was Angel’s 100th — Cordelia came back! I won’t spoil it, but whoa. Fabulous. I never would have expected any of that. Such huge plot development in just one episode. It makes up for the ones where something happens, and they fix it, and that’s it. I was up late finishing my homework, but I’m getting used to little sleep.

Yesterday, I managed to stay awake all day. The AP Lit poetry discussion wasn’t as difficult to follow (read: stay awake during) as usual. I’ve decided to take the AP US History test. Two days of testing back-to-back might kill me, but it’ll be almost the end of the year, so I’ll have time to recover. Jarred agreed to loan me his unused book from last year. I’ll check next week and see if he won’t just sell it to me. He’ll get it back used, and then he still won’t be able to use it, so he might as well make some money from it.

After school, I went to the ROTC Bachelor Auction. I didn’t bid, though. I can carry my own books, I don’t need a ride, I don’t need a date, and I get the feeling Greg wouldn’t like it. It was great to watch, though. The highest “sale” was $45, which is astounding. Jordan came in second with, $31 (they started the bidding at $2). He came out with a rose, which I assumed he’d give to whomever bought him, but he gave it to Mykella! Ian also sold for $31 (?), Paul for $10 (to Vicki), Jarred for… I think $5, and Ricky for $2 or $3. They started late, so it took forever, but I had so much fun just watching and laughing. Michael (a senior, I think, but I don’t know him), started taking off his clothes to keep the bidding going. It worked; he sold for $25. Dominique tried to raise his haul by dancing on one of the tables, but Mr. Curtis caught him and stopped the bidding at $12. Ms. Sim showed up, camera phone in hand. Greg talked to her and said Dominique was too far away for her to snap. That’s going to make an interesting warm-up on Monday.

It started sleeting when I came home. I thought it was hail, but I guess hailstones are bigger. It’s been sleeting and raining since last night, so the ice on the roads was too much for school today. Another ice day. The poor underclassmen will be stuck in school until July at this rate. It started as a two-hour delay, but my mom called and woke me up to tell me about the cancellation. We get out two hours early on Monday for a Board of Education rally. Not that I mind short school days, but they always tick off the teachers.

Also, congratulations to Stephanie for getting a Dean’s Scholarship to UMBC! Money is money, girl. I’m still waiting for my decision from them!

Almost forgot the Friday Five: Risk.

1. What’s the most daring thing you’ve ever done? Off the top of my head… confessing my crush about Mark. To Greg, no less.

2. What one thing would you like to try that your mother/friend/significant other would never approve of? Some small part of me wants to get a tattoo. Nothing big or gaudy, just small and cute. Like Rachel’s heart tattoo on the small of her back on Friends. That was so pretty.

3. On a scale of 1-10, what’s your risk factor? (1=never take risks, 10=it’s a lifestyle) 2, maybe 3.

4. What’s the best thing that’s ever happened to you as a result of being bold/risky? Greg.

5. … and what’s the worst? I rarely take risks, and from what I remember, they’ve all turned out okay. Unless something so horrific happened that I’ve blocked it from my memory. The X-Files, anyone? It’s not as improbable as you might think.


If you get a chance to go to Google today, check out the neat logo. I love how they change it for holidays, but I didn’t expect one today. They’re called julia fractals. I don’t know what that has to do with today, but math aside, they’re still pretty.

Also, that scholarship from the University of Pittsburgh isn’t a full ride, it’s full tuition. Still exciting, though.

Will someone please explain why we’re out of school today? There’s no such thing as an ice day. We might as well have heat days in June (most of the school’s not air conditioned). I’m not saying I’d rather have gone to school today. Relaxation and sleep is always appreciated, but still.

Am I the only person on the planet who didn’t watch the Superbowl at all? I saw part of a Pizza Hut commercial with Jessica Simpson and Miss Piggy (Muppets are cool), but I was surfing. I missed the streaker and the Justin-Janet exposure incident. I’ve heard enough about both to be fully informed, though. I think this is the new Madonna-Britney kiss. Which, by the way, does anyone else find it weird that when people talk about that kiss, they never mention Christina? She did it, too. I’m not applauding it, but at least get your facts straight.

This entry is very scattered and piecey. That’s how my thoughts are today. I wrote a new profile just now. I like it much better than the laundry list I had before. (Where does that come from? There’s no such thing as a laundry list. A shopping list. A grocery list. A packing list. Not a laundry list.) I love the format of Rajni’s and Mykella’s profiles, so I wrote mine more like that. It’s still very Lindsay, though. (My name is now an adjective.)

I don’t want to go to school tomorrow. A math quiz, the impending return of my suck-tacular RP chapter, and an NHS meeting before school.

Prom, the end of my high school career, and graduation are in approximately four months.

My counter shows almost 3000 visitors. Of course, that includes me (when I check my guestbook) and excludes all the hits before mid-April of last year. That makes me feel loved. It makes me want a new layout, too, but after working on my profile, I’m not up for it today. I’ll save that for another lazy weekend. Or another snow/ice/flash flood day.

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